so i just got off the phone with my ex boyfriend. we broke up a little over a year ago, after he'd been out of the country for five months. i don't feel like it was the right decision to break up with him, but it did allow me to go out with someone new, who introduced me to orthodoxy, which i adored from my first liturgy. the new boyfriend ended up becoming my godbrother when we were chrismated this past lazarus saturday. my ex and i were talking about getting back together after he gets back from india in about a year.
he doesn't love orthodoxy the way i do. he respects it. he has read some writings by archimandrite seraphim aleksiev and he is currently reading the orthodox church by bishop kallistos ware. his major stumbling points are the theotokos and the saints, and the invisible church versus the "institutionalized" church. they don't match up with his idea of how God has been "speaking" to him.
basically, and i hate putting it this way, we feel really strongly attached to one another. i can't realistically imagine marrying another person. is that totally immature?
i'd just like to get some feedback and opinions, not to be interpreted as spiritual guidance (of course i will talk to my priest about this), of how i should be looking at this, and what i should be doing. cos i'm pretty lost and distressed. merci beacoup.
Is your question "Is that totally immature?" Or what specifically are you asking?
If he says God is "speaking" to him, maybe you should ask him how he knows it's God speaking to him. I wonder about Christians, or anyone, who says "God told me this." You find this often in Evangelical Churches, and often among Mormons. Most Orthodox I've spoken with do not say, "God told me such and such." Just press him on his reasons for why he knows or believes God is actually speaking to him.
It sounds more like an opinion to me that he's held for a long time. Socrates tells us he is a midwife who helps people "give birth" to their opinions. He helps people to see if their opinions are "wind eggs" meaning false opinions.
For instance, I grew up in a Protestant church, and I heard the opinion over and over that Satan puts thoughts in our minds. Not until yesterday did I even consider that that opinion could be false. If a demon walked up to me and started putting thoughts in my mind, I'd converse with him. I'd ask him, "Why should I believe that?"
Forgive me, Evangelicals and Mormons, for painting such a broad brush stroke... I think it was unfair for me to single you out, for it's likely for anyone to fall into that sort of trap. "God told me so." Well, ask yourself if you have good reason to say so. Ask yourself if it isn't a cop out. An avoidance to do the hard work of reasoning with yourself to get to the truth.